ONLY 3 lbs?!?! And how I pushed myself too far last week.

 

I had my 6 week follow up at the surgeon's office last week.  Everything is going really well and there are no concerns about my surgery recovery or progress, except for my concerns about that scale. I know about stalls. I know that it's still a loss. I logically know all of the things, but it still stung looking at that number. Going into it I expected to see a big number.

I'd only seen 10 pounds from my surgery date to my first visit and that surprised me with all the stories of big big losses that first visit. I accepted the fact that I was still having a lot of inflammation from surgery. I also conceded that I was retaining water and that was ok. 

However, going into this next appointment I felt like this was it. I was going to see at least 10 more pounds. My clothes are getting loose and there are inches gone. I had a shirt on that had been very tight in the arms and it fit correctly. My sweatpants couldn't be trusted outside of the house because they were falling down. It would definitely show up on the scale and I was ready to rejoice. 

I left the appointment reminding myself of the non-scale victories and how my energy was making a return. I gave myself a reminder that I'm not weighing at home because I don't want to get stuck on the number on the scale. I tried to be content and good with all the positives. 

Trying and succeeding are indeed not the same. I spent all last week running around, making use of all my new energy, and kicking it into high gear to show that scale. It was prom week for my youngest and I used that as my excuse to run myself ragged. Not a wise  plan. 

This weekend I crashed and it was not fun. It was like as soon as my daughter was dropped at her prom, all of the energy in my body fled and I could barely move. I spent the weekend struggling to do anything and feeling drained every time I moved. Food was harder on my stomach, like in the first week after surgery. It wasn't pain, but it felt wrong. 

So, I went back to the pureed foods and liquids. I dialed back on activity and gave myself 2 days to rest. Last night I tried a soft food dinner and it was ok. I will continue to take it slow and see how my body does with everything I put into it. I will slowly ramp up my activities again, stopping when my body tells me to. 

I forgot to listen to my body, which was how I got here in the first place. Here's hoping that's the only reminder I will need. It was not a fun weekend, but it could have been worse.